Anna and Gianni are very happy: they have finally obtained permission to do the excavations in that esplanade that was once a square, called - it seems - with a singular name that dates back to antiquity: Montecitorio, Mentecitorio, Mentetitorio. Historians and archeologists still did not agree on the exact name. But one thing was certain: more or less a thousand years ago that place was very important. The very symbol of what at the time was called Democracy resided there. Something now past and obsolete, but to which the inhabitants of that period seemed - they seemed - attach great importance. The ruins of that palace were right there, within reach of Anna and Gianni. Finally! They could dig and figure out what this weird really was democracy. It was known that a few years after 2020 a meteorite hit the majestic building. It was a selective meteorite, now well known in 3020, which had annihilated all the parliamentarians who had a strange symbol: 5 stars. It was not known at the time, but from some documents one could understand the extraordinary nature of the fact, which the ancestors did not know how to explain. In 3020, however, it was clear: the meteorite hit the most incapable.
Anna and Gianni immediately get to work. Among stones and debris they begin to pull out some documentation. It turns out that in the political elections of March 4 (at that time the months had other names than in 3020) the 5 stars had obtained 34% of the votes and had brought 221 deputies to that building and 112 senators to another, not far from there. , perhaps called Madama Palace, also hit by the same meteorite. But for that they still do not have authorization to search (everything has changed for a thousand years now, but the bureaucracy has not). So the attention of the two researchers focuses on these strange pentastellates that had fascinated a people who - as far as Anna and Gianni knew - had been civil, had had its own institutions and a certain level of culture.
Gianni was very good at retrieving data from those gadgets that seemed so advanced at the time: they gave him strange names, like computer, internet, blog, web, twitter, facebook, network, streaming. Now even the smallest children didn't want to play with it.
So it is not difficult for him to start deciphering the 5 stars. For example, he discovers that at some point the tribe had had a chief, Di Maio or Di Majo or De Maio who had transferred Chile to Venezuela. This Di Maio or De Maio had been very important from 2018 to 2020: vice president of the council, minister of labor and minister of economic policies. He had to be a genius, Gianni thinks, a political phenomenon. Since, once he leaves the three robes, he becomes foreign minister. A very delicate role, you know. As he continues to sift through, he comes across the claim that Russia is a "Mediterranean country". Ohibò, thinks the young archaeologist - who was a scholar of history but was also very fond of geography - a thousand years ago there must have been a rapprochement of the continents that no one has ever talked about.
Then he discovers that on a trip he calls the then president of China, Ping, instead of his real name: Xi Jinping. Maybe they were friends, thinks Gianni. Hey, Ping, do you know the latest? After all, he was foreign minister, not just any passerby. But as we said Gianni is also a historian and jumped when he sees that the genius of Italian politics had confessed to admiring the French people "for their millenary democracy". In the face ofAncient Regime and the revolution of 1789. And the peppa! Gianni begins to question himself. It was not easy to extricate oneself, not so much in the so-called computer tools, as in what he said. "'We are like jellyfish, our body is made up of 90% water”, He discovers at one point.
Then another fragment about the cancer lobby. A lobby? of cancer patients? But tell me what country this was, where cancer patients lobbied for their dirty, sinister interests (like being treated? Think Gianni). Yet he had learned that it was a civilization with centuries and centuries of history, master of his language. How then to interpret a wrong subjunctive three times in a row in the same post on Facebook? Of course, Di Maio or De Majo came from a town near Naples or Neaples or Neapolis (even here the scholars disagreed) and perhaps the same language was not spoken there as Rome (which is immortal and always remains Rome, on this the scholars were all in agreement), so much so that Gianni at a certain point discovers that ours was called Giggino 'or phenomenon.
It was clear then that, suddenly catapulted into Rome, he was unable to understand anything. But he had been made head, by his own people, that he had to be like him. How else to explain that an undersecretary - Who knows what this word means, asks Gianni, maybe it wasn't an important thing if the undersecretary Di Stefano sends his solidarity to foreigners "To our Libyan friends", after a tragic event that happened in Lebanon and not in Libya. Or what to think of 14 people's representatives present a bill against "one third of the pasta sold in Italy produced with buckwheat". But if I know too, a thousand years after the grain in question is not that produced by the nomadic people who founded Islam!
The archaeologist is increasingly dazed. He finds an artifact where a certain Sibilia, head of the school and university for the tribe, says that "the Thousand landed in Quarto", from where - as he was well known - they had instead left. And what about a certain Piera Aiello who declares: "the Jews in Auschwitz were lucky enough to be killed". In Auschwitz? Luck? He had studied that in the first half of the 900s the Jews had been tortured, tortured, killed by certain Germans who called themselves Nazis and the symbolic place of this extermination was precisely Auschwitz. He begins to doubt: what have I studied so far?
Ah, this is interesting. It seems that Giggino 'or phenomenon in 2018 appeared from a balcony (but hadn't there already been another one that looked out on the balcony to harangue the crowds? No, yes, that was in the first half of 1900) to announce that poverty had been abolished by decree. GREAT, thinks Gianni. See, I salute you. And in fact the following finds certify that poverty in Italy, both absolute and relative, was there as it was before, immortalized. However, think with hope, at least what Giggino called Dignity Decree will have been successful. He had to solve the problem of the exploited riders but the same riders (who in 3020 were called messengers) had not seen anything even with glasses.
If this talkative tribal chief had also been minister of economic development, he must have done something - our young archaeologist says increasingly puzzled. He will have resolved some disputes. Let me look better. Let's see'. There were hundreds of corporate crises in those years. Pernigotti - Gianni knows, they were chocolatiers more than a thousand years ago. No, Pernigotti no. Di Maio had ruled that she had to remain Italian, but unfortunately he had forgotten that there was no law on the matter. Then MercatoneUno or Whirpool. Well, with the latter there is half his house, something will have ... No, no not even here. Poor Giggino, he says he knew nothing of the corporate crisis, too bad they let him know that the ministry he led was informed, and how. Then I want my money back. Ah finally, thinks Gianni, now he flexes his muscles. No, no .. not even this one, indeed it is the Italian government that pulls out 17 million euros.
Gianni decides to consult with Anna, who was sifting through a little further. Anna in addition to being an archaeologist, had also studied the science of archaic politics. Not that it was a highly regarded specialty in 3020, by policy it had not been spoken for at least a millennium, indeed perhaps for 1200-1300 years. But for Gianni it was important because he just couldn't understand what civilization (?) They had come across. Anna is also very confused. "Look what I found”She says.
Documents that explicitly indicate how the 5s wanted to leave Europe and its currency, even with a referendum, "but if I remember correctly in 2020 those that the ancients called Constitution did not allow the use of this instrument for foreign policy and economic matters. We need to understand better what this Europe was, I vaguely remember hearing about it a long time ago as a failed experience shortly after 2020, Anna continues, and then I discover that they gave a decisive vote for the election of the commission president. European Ursula von der Leyen, does not seem consistent ”. But he knows well that in what he was called policy consistency was not so necessary. “But here we exaggerate”, he thinks. Immediately after arguing that the European institutions were a den of bureaucrats, technocrats and slackers, as if nothing had happened, it turns out that the EU after all could be an ally of the Italian people. Bah.
And keep looking. No alliances once they get to Parliament - they promised during the election campaign. “From the studies I have done on archaic politics, I understand that according to the Italian system of the 2000s, without alliances it is essentially impossible to govern. And in fact they first allied themselves with a named tribe Lega or Lega Nord, or Laga for Salvini (Here too we have to find out who he was, but if I understand correctly he was an unscrupulous little good, cynical with no ideals or great merits). A year later with another herd of diametrically opposite tendency (to be studied too because it is not clear what they were, what they wanted, what they proposed), The who had a certain as their leader Zingarus or Brevis Zingarus. From the images I was able to find, the man looks like he just came out of the belly of a whale, but in this case it seems to be a giant cricket. Gods The the 5s before ruling with them had said plague and horns. Demons who came out of the underworld to tear the people to pieces. Then to that same people they explained that nothing was true, that Brevi Zingarus it was not absolute evil, indeed it could be governed well. And with the same chieftain as before, chosen by them when they were with Salvinsu, such Count, or Comites or You eat. Perhaps he was a noble wanted by popular acclaim. It had happened other times over the millennia. But soon Anna discovers at the announcement that the prime minister would be Conte, in Italy he had risen, like the choir of Nabucco, a giant "and who the fuck is?"
Of course these archaics were just strange, also because here is a declaration of a Rubber plant (no, Gianni, nothing to do with Benjamin, although I suspect the IQ may be the same) or Fico in which he says that: "even mediation and compromise, which must be sought in a parliamentary republic, will have firm, clear and acceptable boundaries". And Ficus is none other than the president of this Montecitorio that we are studying. And where did the “we will never ally ourselves with anyone”? And then this speaks of a parliamentary republic. Weren't they the ones that "one is worth one", or rather no representative democracy but assembly method? But how? Jump on Gianni: I found a lot of fragments and documents that indicate in this de Mjo or whatever his name is, the political leader. In my opinion these were playing the three card game. “But no - Anna replies - maybe it was a propitiatory rite”.
Listen listen - continues the girl - they said that you can not do more than two terms, but it seems that then if they took it back: it is explainable by the fact that almost none of the 300 and passes had had a job before. What did they do if they went home? They had also promised a hard punch against those who had rigged the refunds and instead many remained there. They thundered against high speed, but when they got to the government and realized how much it cost to go back, they let it go. Ditto for the drilling for diesel. Years of rallies, of demonstrations that ended in nothing.
They wanted to abolish parliamentary immunity but in 2018 they voted against the authorization to proceed for that Wipes (Salvini, corrects Gianni) who kidnapped people on board a ship: I told you it was bad. Anna sits discouraged on a ruin. Here the more we find finds, the more we understand nothing, he thinks. My whole major in archaic politics goes to hell. Look here. They lashed out at the banks, the bilge of all evil, then when they were in government they saved those in difficulty leaving the victims unpaid. And to think that in the electoral campaign it was one of their strong points. Once they've done something right, a: that is to say to increase the salary - inadequate - to a wretch chosen by them to lead a very important institution that gave pensions to the whole country, they kept it hidden. How is it possible? Even to find the money, so as not to touch the budget that was public - never mind anyone sees it - they cut costs under the heading "Post office, telegraphic and telephone expenses". And what's wrong with the president's salary? Perhaps it was the layering of various versions of the legend. But yes, that's it: they couldn't be that foolish.
Each one returns to work on their own pieces. At one point Gianni calls Anna. “Help me understand this civitas income, because I'm going into the ball ”. “Ah - she smiles - no, it was Basic income. You said so because you also read gods navigator. It is evident that they still spoke a little Latin. It is not easy to understand, not even I find myself there so much. I have exhibits here, but they are not very clear. In short, it was money that had to go to the poor people waiting to find work ”. "And who gave him the job?" says Gianni. “Bah, maybe i navigator (which first had to be 10 thousand, then 6 thousand, in the end just under 3 thousand). But it seems like they got lost in the ether, because I don't find anything about them. I only discovered that out of almost 3 million applications, one million was not considered suitable for work, 100 instead found it and 12 families were revoked. But maybe something else will come out later, because if I understand correctly they won the 2018 elections.
"It will be ... ..." replies Gianni and starts back to his notes. Suddenly a scream from Anna. Come and see what I found! It's a bomb: The boss was and wasn't Giggino. Above him there was a poet, or rather two, but then a third arrived. But the guru, the founder, the trainer of thought was a certain
That is, Juzif Grillus - also called Beppe Grillo.
He gave his beliefs to his followers through a Sacred Blog, the slogan was Honesty . He had invented the V day to call the people to wake up and throw away all the injustices, the misdeeds, the robberies of the political class of the time (but why V?). Do you think he wanted to open Parliament like a can of tuna. Was he a revolutionary, a pure then? - says Gianni. Not so much, replies the young archaeologist. Look what I found. Meanwhile, he had been convicted of the manslaughter of three people. Then, after having lashed out against the building amnesty, a widespread practice at the time, and asked for one for his two houses. He wanted transparency and Honesty, but when the taxman made his income available, he was pissed off like a beast. And I also understand, in 2005 he had a taxable income of over 4 million euros, he who was angry with the rich. Not only that: a house on the beach in Malindi is registered to his wife's sister. To his brother-in-law and driver a limited company in Costa Rica. In 2008 he bought a house in Switzerland, explaining that he did it to protect the Sacred Blog in case of blackout. A newspaper that to tell the truth, if I understand correctly, did not love him very much, discovered that his villas were stacked as "villas" to pay less taxes. In spite of the villas, look here Gianni: above Genua or Genoa, 24 rooms and two swimming pools, in Tuscany 21 rooms, swimming pool, 5.600 square meters of land and a 70 meter boathouse. To my knowledge, only the princeps they could afford so much.
See, Anna observes, based on my studies of archaic politics, I have an idea. The 5 Star Movement (by the way, you know that I found documents which show that they blood-bombed each other because those who were in government were fiercely accused of behaving as if they were a party and not a movement , considered purer?) had made the radical nature of his promises the founding character of his own diversity, and on that diversity he built his success. They had managed to convince the Italians that it was possible to send a non-party made up of non-politicians to the government. To do this, they came up with things that, if you think about it, were the essence of what they called politics then. Take alliances, they are the tool with which a party could go to government and change things. Or the ruling class: these came from nowhere, they didn't have a capable one - just look at everything we found. They preached the two-term limit to people who didn't have a minimum of political experience and who needed at least some time to figure out where they were. It is obvious that they have been forced to back down on everything. They promised the moon and didn't even know what it was. And then, Gianni, you have to agree, you can't do politics by saying you hate politics, saying you are something else, hard and pure. Come on, if as soon as they had the armchairs they stuck to them! And The Sacred Blog they put it in their pocket!
“Maybe we need to ask the advice of other archaeologists,” says Gianni resigned. And go back to his files. At one point he screams. “I found the Word of the poet, look at this“. It's kind of a slip on which Juzif Grillus wrote: "FUCK YOU".
The two look puzzled. And they ask themselves: has he said it before or after?
ps: names and facts are purely invented by the writer. There cannot realistically exist a country where so much consent has been given to such a group of poor people who have run away from home.